


Talking to the Moon

by expiredgarlicbread



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Physical Abuse, Self-Esteem Issues, not a whole lot but it’s there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:28:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24150577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/expiredgarlicbread/pseuds/expiredgarlicbread
Summary: Remus recently broke up with his abusive ex and is a mess at the moment. Janus finds him sitting on the roof outside his window and they talk about it. Emotions are released and confessions are said, you get the idea.
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Remus Sanders/Anonymous
Kudos: 67





	Talking to the Moon

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is my first piece of writing and I know it’s a bit sloppy but I hope y’all like it nonetheless :’)
> 
> Also, his ex is anonymous, so go ahead and imagine whoever you’d like.

It felt like it was just yesterday when he got into his first relationship. Things had gone well for the first few weeks until his boyfriend began acting more harshly. He figured it was his own doing considering he’s well... Remus, so he brushed it off. 

Soon, he started lashing out more and more to where both his emotional stability and ego dropped drastically. The names his now ex once called him replayed in his mind ever since, leaving him to cry in his room every day late at night, just like now.

There, sat Remus, alone, on the roof outside his window. He sighed as he pulled his legs to his chest. It made him feel safe in a way, but he wasn’t quite sure why. Looking up, the stars shined brightly, all sorts of sizes and luminosity.

It wasn’t long before he heard a door open from inside and his name was called. He didn’t bother answering as the figure looked to the open window. Leaning over the window sill, the voice called.

“Remus? What are you doing?” Janus asked. Once more, no answer was given. The two stood in a moment of silence before Remus finally spoke up.

“I like it out here.”

The other sighed before climbing over the sill and joining him on the roof. “Well, that can’t be true. Despite what others may think, you’re not exactly a fan of heights.”

“We broke up, Dee,” Remus blurted out, staring at the ground below.

Janus turned, looking at him with concerned eyes. “What? Why?”

Remus huffed and rubbed his eyes before more tears came. He was tired of crying. It was a time-waster. “I don’t know. H-he told me I was useless; I didn’t do anything helpful. And that I was “disgusting” to be around,” he replied, quoting him with his fingers.

“I thought you two were happy together?” Deceit knew there was something off about his said to be “perfect” relationship, but Remus always brushed it off, saying everything was fine.

“I- agh... it wasn’t,” he answered, shifting in place awkwardly. “There were a few things I never told you.”

“...Rem?” Janus asked slowly. “What did he do?”

Remus looked back up the sky again, more tears rushing to his eyes. Why couldn’t he just think of something else? Something to distract his head.

Letting out a soft chuckle, he muttered under his breath. “Remember when I told you I was attacked by a creature in the imagination?” 

Janus almost felt his heart drop at that. He remembered it crystal clear. He’d found the other side marked with bruises all over. Obviously worried, he asked what happened to only receive what was an “I swear, it’s fine. I was reckless out there! You shoulda seen me!” 

“That was him?”

Remus nodded silently. “I made a mistake earlier that day and he freaked out and just...” he trailed off, dropping his head into his arms, sniffling.

Janus wasn’t exactly great with comforting others so he wasn’t really sure what to do as the one next to him fell apart.

“Um...” he tried, holding out his arms weakly, “need a hug?” 

The other nodded and threw himself into his arms, sobbing harder into his cloak. Deceit had never seen him so broken in his entire existence.

Remus pulled back, the eyeshadow around his eyes smudged and running down his face. “Thanks, Jan. I- I needed that.”

“Not a problem,” said side answered. “I just-“ he paused. “Why are you still so upset? He can’t hurt you anymore, right?” 

Remus wishes he had an answer, honestly. He wasn’t sure either. Maybe he missed the good times they shared, maybe he wanted more. Maybe, the words the other said to his face stuck and every time he looked in the mirror that was all he thought about. He’d built up a high self-esteem over time just for it to be crushed in an instant. He hated himself now.

“...I don’t know.”

Janus scooted closer to him and wrapped an arm gently around his shoulder. “Is this okay?”

Remus nodded, resting his head on the other’s shoulder, “Yeah.” 

They sat together on the roof, staring at the sky once more, enjoying the company of each other.

“Do you ever wonder why things happen the way they do?” The twin whispered.

“Of course I do,” Janus shrugged.

“Well?”

“Remus, you know I don’t have an easy answer for that. Maybe it’s the choices we make along the way, maybe it’s just how life works,” he answered with a small sigh.

“...I wish I would’ve known how bad it was gonna get,” the other said quietly.

“Well, there was no way for you to know until it happened,” he replied, “At least now, you don’t have to worry about him anymore.”

Nodding, the other agreed, still staring at the sky. 

“I’m sorry,” Remus muttered under his breath out of nowhere.

Janus, confused, asked, “What are you apolog-“ before he was cut off as the other looked and leaned forward, connecting their lips. 

He almost wishes he could say he enjoyed it before he realized the other was currently not in the right mind state. He was trying to get any affection at the moment after all the abuse from his ex. As much as Deceit hated to say it, he had to stop him.

Janus pulled away and without a chance to say anything, the other muttered countless apologies, calling himself stupid and reckless.

“Remus,” he stopped him, holding him by his wrists and spoke slowly. “It’s okay.”

Remus looked to him with glossy eyes. “No, it’s not. I shouldn’t have- I... you don’t feel that way. I didn’t even ask! I’m an idiot!”

“I didn’t stop you because I don’t feel that way. I stopped you because you’re in need of some sort of affection and I don’t want you to think that you can just kiss it away. Everything is okay, Rem, alright?” Janus answered honestly and let go of his arms.

The other took a few breaths and then asked very hushedly, “...Do you?”

“Do I what?”

“Do you feel that way?” Remus clarified.

Deceit wasn’t really sure what to say. If he said that he did, where would it go from here? If he said he didn’t, which would be a lie, it’d probably break Remus even more.

“Yes,” he answered simply.

“Oh,” the other said. “How long?”

“Too long.” It was excruciating watching a person you loved in a relationship with someone else but he always told himself it was for the best.

”So, you never had a thing for emo?”

”Virgil? No. And besides, he hates me anyway,” Janus concluded. “It wouldn’t have worked out.”

Attempt after attempt, he could never truly get Virgil to listen to him. He wasn’t sure what he did but whenever he asked, he never received an answer.

“Well,” Remus nudged Janus with a small grin, “I don’t hate you, Double Dee.”

Laughing softly, Janus remarked, “That certainly is a relief.”

Suddenly, there was a chill that brushed through the air, making the two shiver. Checking the time, Deceit carefully stood up from his spot and held out a gloved hand to the other.

“It’s getting cold and quite frankly, late. Let’s head back inside.” Grabbing his hand, Remus followed and climbed over the window sill once more. Janus closed and locked the window behind them with a warm exhale.

“Feel a bit better now?”

Remus nodded. “Yeah... thanks.”

“No problem.” And with that, he headed towards the door, ready to go back to his room.

“Hey, Dee?” The said side stopped, turning in his tracks.

“Yes?”

Remus knew he’d bothered Janus enough already but still, he hoped he could do one more thing.

“Could you just stay a little longer? I-“ Before he could finish, Janus was already back by him, agreeing.

“Of course.”

That was all it took before Remus enveloped Janus into a helpless hug. He hugged back in response and brushed the other’s messy hair out of the way, placing a light kiss on his forehead.

Things would get better for him, Janus knew. It would just take some time to heal.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope it wasn't too shabby but hey, it's a start. Let me know if I need to add any other warnings in the tags, thanks!


End file.
